Dating in LA Sucks, Part VI


It’s been a while since I had a post for the Minty Dating Machine series. Mainly because I’ve had very few dates (due to lack of time and interest) and some odd stalker-y situations I rather not get into. These people are stalking me after all!

But something happened to me last week that I still can’t quite comprehend. I was sitting at the bar waiting for a friend who was more than a little late for dinner. I was quite fine though as it’s one of my favorite restaurants and I was having a great time chatting with my peeps there.

Then this dude sidles up to me and proceeds to chat me up about sports, opera, his skin cancer and just the daily grind. I wasn’t thinking much of it and much preferred talking to the bartenders, one of whom I’ve been on a bar crawl on but never actually had any of his drinks. I decided this was the night to try them out. Being friendly, I allowed this guy to taste my drink and he said it was entirely undrinkable and I had to get another. I was very offended for my bartender friend but more offended when he started to trash talk.

I don’t understand when men try certain tactics and when it doesn’t work, try something that doesn’t work for little boys and much less for grown men. Little boys may pull your pigtails, kick and make fun of you which your mommy will tell you they like you. But you know in your heart of hearts you HATE that and could not “like” that little boy back.

And this is what that man did. When I didn’t respond to his positive comments about my skin, hair or fashion sense (he particularly liked my handbag), he tried insulting me. Being the sort that has good self-esteem and humor, I didn’t take him seriously even if the comments were so insulting, I’m still reeling a bit. Here are some of the things he said:

“Do you surf? You should. Would love to see you in a bikini.”

I shook my head and he said, “Why wouldn’t you wear a bikini? Is it because you’re fat?”

And then it got worse.

“So you like hiking?”

And when I said I did, he said he couldn’t tell– again making reference I’m fat!?

He then said something similar about going to the gym which I said I didn’t mind doing. “I can’t tell. Your arms are so big.”

Uh? He said more things in the span of a few minutes.

I don’t get it. He kept saying all these horrible things but would say he LIKED fat girls. What the hell?

I was talking to the bartenders about another singles event and he said, “Oh, but I am single. I don’t want to be single.” As if I would help him out on that!

When my dining partner  got there, he tried to tell her she should be sorry for being so late. I wasn’t mad and repeatedly said that. He said, “well, animals get mad. People get angry.” I was then really put off. He tried to make fun of what my friend was wearing but I wasn’t having none of it. He could call me fat and all these bitchy things but I am not going to stand for someone making fun of my friend. Maybe when it happens to you, you have no concept of just how awful it is but being the sort that cares deeply about my friends, I was ready to fight. I actually did push him several times before I got up and said I wanted my table.

Later I told the folks at the restaurant and they were shocked. He’s apparently never behaved this way before. Or maybe he has and no one said anything. Unfortunately, in my bad decision making, I had given him my information prior to these insults and yes, he did call and text me. I did not respond. It was too incredulous. Did  he really expect me to want to date someone who was that mean, that rude, that dumb?

Really. Please. The Minty prefers being single. And apparently fat.

Let’s give up to another reason why dating in LA sucks.